The Good & The Boring

About a little over a month ago I was 'talking' with a close friend, via Marco Polo. We have been using the app religiously since the pandemic and we haven't given it up.

We were giving each other our usual highlights of the week reporting on sleeping patterns, or lack thereof of our children, if we had found time to go running, how relationships marital and familial were going and as always how our professional lives were. 

During one of these weekly status reports, I found myself with very little to share - no squabbles, no sick children, injuries or workplace challenges. The whole week was like that, each time my friend messages me - there was nothing "new" - for a minute I thought to myself, "Is my life boring? Am I boring? What is going on?" 

I thought to myself, "Is my life boring? Am I boring? What is going on?" 

After that minute passed I immediately realized - this is the GOOD LIFE! I have very clear memories from my late 20's and early 30's pleading with fate for a untilmutious life - where things felt steady and life felt healthy. My 20's were full of unhealthy relationships with myself and others. I felt a deep sense of pressure to be more - something that seemed more glamorous, respectful, or fast paced - to live up to this potential that I believed was somewhere inside me or maybe it is my lack of self confidence - and my Mom's cancer, always there for a decade and half, creating continuous emotional and financial strain.

Six years now since my Mom passed - I’m happily married with kids, teaching at an amazing school where I feel valued and respected,  my days aren't perfect, far from but when my friend asks me, "what's new?" and I reply "Meh, not much. Nothin' new" What I really mean is, I have found some steadiness - I found the even ground that I always wished for. 

There is some glamour -  the girl often ask me to dress up in my wedding dress, they cover themselves in the bridesmaids dresses I have worn that are still in my closet. I can now cook dinner in under 15 minutes when the stakes are high, and there are at least 12 little people who sit at circle time three times a week and believe me when I say, "We show people we care about them by listening to their words."

Life is good and boring. It won't always be but I will take it when I can!

Thanks for listening,

Jenny xo